Finding friends?

Question

Hello. I'm an American student studying abroad in Berlin until December. I'm trans(mtf) if that's at all relevant to this post. I am feeling homesick, although I've only been here for a few days, I feel like I need to find some friends in order to help remedy this problem. The people in my program don't really seem to be interested in the things I am... they're mostly just interested in clubbing or drinking. I prefer going out to eat, talking, and going to bookshops.

I was wondering if anyone could give advice on how to make friends here. I can speak some German, but my German isn't the best. It's enough to get by when I go to the shops, asking for directions, etc. Actually having a deep conversation, though, isn't at a place I'm at yet. I feel rude using English all of the time, and so I tend to be a little skittish of talking to people.

I thank anyone who can provide any kind of advice.

alin · Answer

Since you're in a program but not clicking with the group, try the smaller indie cinemas around Prenzlauer Berg or Mitte. Places like Kino Central or Lichtblick often have English-language screenings followed by discussions where people actually talk about the film rather than just drinking after. It's a lower-pressure way to meet people who want conversation over clubbing, and most attendees are used to switching between German and English mid-sentence. The queer scene in Berlin is big on these kinds of cultural events too, so you won't stand out for being trans or for your language level.

augusta · Answer

honestly the queer scene here is pretty scattered but there's a few spots that are more chill than the clubs. try cafe kaputt in kreuzberg, it's a bookshop cafe with a lot of nooks where people actually sit and read or chat, not just drink. they do a monthly queer book club thing that's super lowkey and english-friendly. also biesdorf has a little secondhand bookshop called buchhandlung ludwig that's quiet and the owner is a trans woman who's really nice about chatting with customers, even if your german is shaky. most berliners don't care if you use english as long as you try a bit, it's more about the vibe you give off

jeanette · Answer

join a meetup or a stammtisch, there's a bunch of english-friendly ones in neukölln or friedrichshain. bötzowstrasse area has a few cozy bookshop cafes like the bookshop cafe that sometimes do events where people actually talk. also check out queer spaces like silverfuture or the trans*berlin group on facebook, they're super welcoming and used to non-german speakers. don't stress about the language thing, most berliners under 40 speak english fine and appreciate the effort

leni · Answer

Check out Couchsurfing events, there are usually meetups that are more about hanging out and talking than drinking. Berlin's scene is huge for that.

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