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Am I being fooled by a lady body?
Hi everyone I'm seeki… EDIT: so the answer is clear to everyone haha so my main question now is WHY would someone put in all this effort to fool me?? (Read the entire thing to understand the scenario)
Hi everyone I'm seeking advice in a relationship - throwaway account for privacy.
I (18M) (Australian) met a Thai girl (18(now 19) F) in late December last year in Bangkok on khaosan road. She did/doesn't speak English. I had walked away from my friends before I met her and she was accompanied by a gay guy who did speak English (75%). I was pretty drunk so I can't completely remember how I introduced myself but long story short me and her ended up going back to a hotel together. There we didn't have sex but she did give me head. When I went to put my hand between her legs she wouldn't let me which I shrugged off as her being shy or whatever. We stayed up all night cuddling and whatnot and at 6/7am she left but I got her socials. The next day I contacted her and me her and her friend went out for food. Then I stayed the night with her again and same story where when I put my hand in between her legs she wouldn't allow it. And during that night her and her friend made jokes about her being a lady boy. So the following morning I asked her seriously about whether or not she was a ladyboy and her friend said she was (he was in the hotel in the morning when I asked) and she said she was too. Later that day she messaged me apologising and said that it was a test to see whether or not I was just after sex (because if I was I would leave a lady boy but if I wasn't I'd stay?) and at first I didn't believe her but later that night (new years eve) I caved and messaged her saying I'd meet up (I genuinely enjoyed her company) so we met up and we stayed together for the next 3 nights and she came to the airport with me to say goodbye as I caught my flight back to Australia.
Here are the reasons I'm skeptical of whether or not she's born a woman. - she's 177cm tall - She wears a US9/10 men's shoe size - She's had plastic surgery on her nose as well as injections in her face (that's all she's told me are apparently both for aesthetics) - Her voice seems to be slightly lower than normal (although I can't really tell with the language barrier) - The majority of her friends are ladyboys - When I was with her although she gave me oral she did not let me see or touch between her legs (not once).
- I haven't seen any photos of her as a child
The reasons why I believe she's born a woman - she's told me many times 100% that she's born a woman - There isn't any visible (although I haven't inspected much) scars beneath her breasts - She said only born females are allowed to wear women's uniform at her school (skirt) which she wore (and which I've seen her (obviously) transgender friend not wearing at the same time) - The main reason - she is extremely devoted and seemingly in love with me. From the time I left she immediately (within a week or 2) began taking English lessons every week. She shares me on her social media very often. She worries about it when I don't message back and is often double (or more) messaging. She gives hours and hours of her time per week to calling me. She attempted to send flowers to my address on Valentine's Day. She's cried when I've upset her. Etc etc etc. - we consider one another boyfriend/girlfriend
After talking about it she agreed to pay for my accommodation if I come back to Thailand (she is very clearly (undeniably) upper class by her possessions and where she lives) as she struggled to get accepted for an Australian travel visa (or so she says). So I am going back next week (for songkran) and plan to spend 17 days with her. She often talks about sex and how she can't wait to (apparently) lose her virginity to me. With this in mind I believe I will be able to definitively tell whether or not she is born a female (I'm far from a virgin).
Although I will find out when I'm there, I'm wondering if I should just cancel the trip/not see her. Tell me If she is a ladyboy (do you think so?) and has been lying to me Is it possible she has sinister plans, if so what could those be?
mate the real answer is she's a ladyboy but that doesn't mean she's running a scam on u. thai girls from upper class families don't need to trick tourists for money, especially ones who are paying for ur accommodation at a songkran rate which is like triple normal prices in bangkok rn. the ladyboy friend group and the "test" story are huge tells, but the english lessons and crying over u are real feelings. just be upfront when ur there, ask her directly at the soi cowboy or ratchada area bars are full of ladyboys but she's clearly not that scene. if she's pre-op and scared of rejection that's different from trying to rob u. keep ur passport in the hotel safe at the asok area and don't bring more than 2000 baht out during songkran anyway because everything gets soaked
The shoe size and height alone don't prove anything. Lots of Thai women are tall and have big feet. What stands out more is that she never let you see or touch her there, even after multiple nights together. That is not normal shyness.
The fact that she's paying for your accommodation and studying English for you suggests this is more about genuine feelings than a scam. Ladyboys who run scams don't typically invest months of effort into one Australian teenager. They work quickly and move on.
You will find out within hours of being alone with her in Thailand. If she still won't let you see or touch, you have your answer. Just keep your passport at your hotel and don't carry large amounts of cash the first few days. Songkran is chaotic enough without adding this stress.
You're overthinking the sinister plans angle. If she wanted to rob you or scam you, she wouldn't be paying for your accommodation and taking English lessons for months. That's a lot of upfront investment for a payoff that might not come.
The most likely explanation is she's a ladyboy who genuinely likes you and is terrified of telling you the truth because she knows how most farang react. The "test" story is a classic face-saving move - she admitted it, saw your reaction, then walked it back. The fact that she controls access to her body completely lines up with someone who has bottom surgery scars or hasn't had surgery yet and is self-conscious.
You'll know for sure within about 30 seconds of being alone with her in Thailand. If she won't let you see or touch her there either, you have your answer. Just keep your wallet and passport somewhere safe until you're certain, and don't sign anything or give her money for any "emergency."
best som tam in Bangkok? Krua Dok Mai Kao 2026
Krua Dok Mai Kao is solid but I've always found their som tam a bit tame on the pla ra. If you want the real funky version, try the shophouse spots along Soi Udomsuk 26, near the night market end. They pound it fresh with fermented fish that'll clear your sinuses, and it's like 60 baht. Different style from the On Nut places, more Lao-leaning.
for som tam specifically i'd say the Isaan spots in Chatuchak are underrated, weekdays only though since the weekend crowd ruins the vibe. there's a stall near gate 2 that does tam pa with fermented bamboo shoots, super sour and funky, not something you see much in On Nut. if you're already heading north for Or Tor Kor anyway its worth the detour.
honestly the som tam at Krua Dok Mai Kao is good but what got me hooked is their nam prik pla raa dip with the raw veggies, that funk hits way harder than the papaya does. think most people sleep on it cuz they just order the som tam and gai yang. also pro tip, go before noon on weekdays, after that teh pla ra gets milder cuz they batch it for the lunch rush
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