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Can we please take a little more discretion over the divorce sob stories?
Most recently, a post (https://www.reddit.com/r/Tokyo/comments/1855csd/wife_ran_away_with_money/ ) had a man insisting his wife ran off with his friend and had stolen his money. Some people read that post and jumped to give legal advice. Others actually read between the lines of the post and noticed OP's fishy story. There was a lot of inconsistencies and weird points in the post, but what stood out most was his wife had abandoned her stuff and quickly fled to a woman's shelter, which for some reason people glazed over for a convenient "harlot stole money" story. OP backtracked to say he only assumed his wife went to a woman's shelter - why would a woman's shelter be the first place he'd assumed she go? You need evidence of abuse to get into those.
And then he quickly deleted the post after people actually started to properly scrutinize his story.
In short, there was so much in OP's comments that pointed to him being a bad actor not telling even most of the story. The divorce sob stories in any Japan adjacent space are rampant, and of course some of them are very valid, others obviously are not in good faith. This was an obvious case of that.
Can we please take a little discretion and more consideration for these kinds of posts? For all you know you're giving advice to an abusive crypto military nut like OP seemed to be on how to further harass their spouse.
ngl the pattern is so obvious once you've been here long enough. what gets me is how people don't question the timeline. like if your spouse supposedly emptied the account and ran off, why are you posting on reddit before going to the koban or calling the family court? the tokyo family court in tachikawa has a free consultation window on weekdays, takes like 30 minutes to get basic advice.
the shelter thing is the real giveaway tho. tokyo josei shien centers in shinjuku and taito ward require a referral from the soumu center or police, plus they interview the person multiple times. if she actually got in, that means she had a paper trail he conveniently ignored. the fact that he went straight to "she must be at a shelter" instead of "i'll call the police" tells you everything about who's the aggressor here.
honestly the mods could solve most of this by requiring a police report number for any divorce or money theft post. without that you're just guessing at best or enabling abuse at worst. the real victims usually show up with paperwork, not dramatic backstories.
yeah that post was a mess from the start. the way he jumped to "she must be at a women's shelter" without any evidence was a huge red flag. those places in tokyo are strict about intake, you don't just show up without a documented history of abuse. i've known people who volunteered at tokyo josei shien centers and they're super careful about who they admit.
the pattern is pretty clear in these japan expat spaces. someone posts a one-sided story, lots of people jump in with legal recs without questioning anything, and then the OP deletes when pressed. it happens in the tokyo expat fb groups too, always the same script.
i think the issue is that a lot of people here don't understand how japanese family courts or police actually work, so they give advice based on their home country assumptions. that's how you get people telling someone to call the police for a civil dispute when the cops here will just tell you to get a lawyer.
fwiw i think a big part of the problem is that people treat these posts like theyre in a j drama instead of real life. like the whole "she ran off with my money and my friend" plot is straight out of a soap opera, but real japanese divorce just doesnt work that way. the family court in tachikawa handles hundreds of these a month and 90% of the time its about visitation rights and splitting pension points, not dramatic cash heists.
the shelter thing is the biggest tell for me. to get into a tokyo DV shelter you need a referral from the soumu center or a police report, and they interview you multiple times. if his wife actually got in, that means she had documentation and a history that he conveniently left out. the fact that he didnt mention calling any of those places to find her says a lot.
honestly the best thing people can do is just not engage with these threads until the OP provides basic proof. like a police report number or a family court case ID. without that youre just feeding a troll or worse, helping an abuser. the mods could easily require that for any divorce advice post, would cut 90% of this drama overnight.
Things to Do in Tokyo (2026)
Start your Tokyo journey at the Tokyo Tower (4-2-8 Shibakoen, Minato), which offers panoramic views from its 150-meter observation deck for 1,200 yen. For a more modern perspec… 🗼 Iconic Landmarks
Start your Tokyo journey at the Tokyo Tower (4-2-8 Shibakoen, Minato), which offers panoramic views from its 150-meter observation deck for 1,200 yen. For a more modern perspective, head to the Shibuya Sky observation deck (2-24-12 Shibuya, Shibuya) for 2,000 yen, open until 10 PM. Both spots are less crowded on weekday mornings.
⛩️ Cultural Temples and Shrines
Visit Senso-ji Temple in Asakusa (2-18-9 Kaminarimon, Taito), Tokyo's oldest temple, open daily from 6 AM to 5 PM. For a quieter experience, explore the Meiji Jingu Shrine (1-1 Yoyogikamizonocho, Shibuya), set in a large forested area and free to enter. Arrive early to avoid crowds, especially on weekends.
🍜 Must-Try Food Experiences
Sample authentic ramen at Ichiran Shibuya (1-22-7 Jinnan, Shibuya), where individual booths let you focus on the tonkotsu broth, starting at 1,290 yen. For a unique twist, try conveyor-belt sushi at Uobei Shibuya (1-19-3 Jinnan, Shibuya), with plates from 100 yen. Reservations are not needed, but expect short queues.
🏯 Hidden Neighborhoods
Explore Yanaka, a district that survived WWII bombings, with narrow lanes and traditional shops like Yanaka Ginza shopping street (3-11-1 Yanaka, Taito). For a bohemian vibe, wander Shimokitazawa (Kitazawa, Setagaya), known for vintage stores and indie cafes. Both areas are best explored on foot in the afternoon.
🚇 Getting Around
Use the Tokyo Metro and Toei Subway networks, with a 24-hour pass costing 800 yen for unlimited rides on most lines. The Suica or Pasmo IC cards are rechargeable and work on trains, buses, and even vending machines. Avoid rush hour (7:30-9 AM and 5-7 PM) to travel comfortably.
🌃 Best Evening Spots
Watch the sunset from the Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building (2-8-1 Nishi-Shinjuku, Shinjuku), where the free observation deck is open until 10 PM. For nightlife, head to Golden Gai in Shinjuku (1-1-6 Kabukicho, Shinjuku), a maze of tiny bars with a cover charge of around 500 yen. Reservations are recommended for popular bars.
🌸 Seasonal Highlights
Cherry blossom season in late March to early April draws crowds to Ueno Park (5-20 Uenokoen, Taito), with over 1,000 cherry trees. For autumn foliage, visit Rikugien Garden (6-16-3 Honkomagome, Bunkyo) in November, lit up at night for 1,000 yen. Check the Japan Meteorological Corporation's forecast for peak dates.
🎁 Unique Souvenirs
Buy traditional crafts at Kappabashi Kitchen Town (3-18-2 Nishiasakusa, Taito), famous for realistic plastic food samples and kitchenware. For quirky gifts, explore Don Quijote stores, like the one in Shibuya (1-16-5 Udagawacho, Shibuya), open 24 hours and offering everything from electronics to snacks. Prices are reasonable, and tax-free shopping is available for tourists.
honestly this is a solid list, you've hit the major spots. one thing i'd add is that the Tsukiji Outer Market is worth a morning even if the inner market moved to Toyosu. the stalls there for tamagoyaki and fresh uni on skewers are unbeatable, and it gets packed by 9am so go early.
for a cheap meal that slaps, try CoCo Ichibanya for curry rice. there's one near basically every station and you can customize the spice level and toppings. it's not fancy but it's a real Tokyo staple that tourists often overlook.
also if you're into temples, the walk from Senso-ji down Nakamise-dori is fun but the side streets in Asakusa have smaller shrines and old-school snack shops that are way less crowded. i stumbled on a tiny place selling matcha soft serve for 350 yen last time and it was better than the touristy ones.